How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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