How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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