How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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