How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow

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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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