How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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