How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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