How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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