How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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