How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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