How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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