How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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