How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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