How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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