How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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