How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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