How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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