How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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