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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?
None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.
But that's just nuts
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.
It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?
I'm all spaced out!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?
A fire cracker
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Why did the lamb cross the road?
To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?
Halloumi.
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Why did the drum take a nap?
It was beat.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?
Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?
A workaraunt.
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