How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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