How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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