How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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