How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.


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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year

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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.

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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.

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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."

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