How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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