How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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