How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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