How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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