How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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