How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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