How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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