How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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