How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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