How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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