How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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