How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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