How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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