How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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