How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.

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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.

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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

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