How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.

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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"



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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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