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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. There never was any light bulb.
Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?
He was caught stealing second base.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me
Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?
Wet.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?
Rootbeer.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?
Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?
Take me to your liter.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?
One.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?
A phew.
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How is a dog like a telephone?
It has a collar I.D.
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