How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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