How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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