How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.

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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".

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