How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.

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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.

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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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