How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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