How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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