How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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