How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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