How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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