How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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