How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.

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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.

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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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