How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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