How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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