How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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