How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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