How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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