How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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