How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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