How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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