How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.


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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"



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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.

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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.

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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah

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