How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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