How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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