How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .

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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.

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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom

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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.

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