How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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