How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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