How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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