How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .

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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.

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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).

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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.


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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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