How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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