How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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