How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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