How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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