How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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