How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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