How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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