How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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