How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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