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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?
As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. There never was any light bulb.
Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.
It's Hans free.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?
Gator-Ade.
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What pine has the longest needles?
A porcupine.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?
To get a mini soda
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,
I just can't think of one atm.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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