How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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