How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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