How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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A seal walks into a club...
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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