How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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