How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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