How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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