How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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