How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic

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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.

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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.

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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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