How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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