How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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