How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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