How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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