How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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