How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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