How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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