How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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