How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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