How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
Canvas not available.

or


What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
Canvas not available.

or


What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
Canvas not available.

or


What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
Canvas not available.

or


How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
Canvas not available.

or


A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

Canvas not available.

or


How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
Canvas not available.

or


What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
Canvas not available.

or


Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
Canvas not available.

or


I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026