Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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