Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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