I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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