I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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