I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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