I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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