I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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