I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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