I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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