I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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