I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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