I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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