I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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