I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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