I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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