I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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