I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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