I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.

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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.

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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.

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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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