I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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