I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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