I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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