I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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