I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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