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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;
I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?
They're both extinct.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?
Gator-Ade.
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What did one ion say to the other?
I've got my ion you.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?
It wasn't raining!
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
OH SNaP!
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I tried nutella on some salmon
got salmonella.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?
She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?
He made an illegal ewe turn.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?
He was board.
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