I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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