I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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