I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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