I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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