I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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A seal walks into a club...
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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