I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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