I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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