I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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