I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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