I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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