I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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