I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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