I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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