I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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