I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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