I tried water polo but my horse drowned.



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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!

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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.

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