I tried water polo but my horse drowned.



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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''

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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.

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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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