I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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