I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.

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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me

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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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