I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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