I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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