I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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