I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

Canvas not available.

or


Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
Canvas not available.

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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
Canvas not available.

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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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