I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

Canvas not available.

or


Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
Canvas not available.

or


What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
Canvas not available.

or


What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
Canvas not available.

or


Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
Canvas not available.

or


What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
Canvas not available.

or


Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
Canvas not available.

or


Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
Canvas not available.

or


How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
Canvas not available.

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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
Canvas not available.

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