I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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