I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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