I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.

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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.

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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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