I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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