I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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