I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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