I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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