I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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