I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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