I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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