I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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