I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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