I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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