I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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