I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.

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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!

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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.

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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.

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