I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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