If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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