If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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