If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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