If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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