If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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