If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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