If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.

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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.

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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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