If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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