If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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