If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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