If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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