If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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