If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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