If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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