If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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