If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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