If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.

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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.

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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.

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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish

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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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