If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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