If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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