If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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