If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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