If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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