I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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