I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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