I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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