I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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