I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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