I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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