I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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