I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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