In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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