In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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