In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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