In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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