In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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