In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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