I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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