I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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