I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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