I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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