I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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