I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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