I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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