I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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