I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop

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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.

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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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