I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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