Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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