Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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