Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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