Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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