Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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