Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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