Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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