Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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