Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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