Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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