Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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