Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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