Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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