Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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