Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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