Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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