Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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