Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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