Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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