Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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