Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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