Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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