Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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