Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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