Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!

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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!

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