"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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