"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.

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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.

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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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