"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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