"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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