"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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