"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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